jackieheartsb:
nostrich:
Full of hilariously ironic commenters intentionally misusing “their” and “there”, and so on, predictably.
my favorite paragraph:
“If you wish to gain the respect of a white person, it’s probably a good idea that you find an obscure and debated grammar rule such as the “Oxford Comma” and take a firm stance on what you believe is correct. This is seen as more productive and forward thinking that simply stating your anger at the improper use of “it’s.”
My favorite line: “If a white person were to catch a mistake in The New Yorker, it would be a sufficient reason for a large party.”
Surely I’m not the only person who didn’t know what an “oxford comma” was until the Vampire Weekend song, right? I have to say, good grammar is one of the things I care least about when it comes to writing. If someone’s a good writer, it doesn’t really matter to me if they confuse “it’s” with “its” and “their” with “they’re.” I know plenty of people who do care though, and this article is hilarious.
Dashboard Confessional
fatmanatee:
Where I note things I found in my dashboard. The first in a series that I will continue if I feel like it:
- Do you really want me to borrow your clothes? That doesn’t even sound good in theory.
haha. I thought the same thing when I read that. Well not exactly, ‘cause I’m a girl—but my boy in a dress, skinny jeans, or a tight girly tee? soooo not sexy (to me, anyway).
The rest of the poem’s really nice, though.
Baby Got Book
sarahchristine:
jessicalouise:
Re-written by Cheryl Klein of Brooklyn Arden
[Female voice]
Oh, my, god. Becky, look at her book. It is so big. *scoff* She looks like, one of those, librarians’ girlfriends. But, you know, who understands those librarians? *scoff* They only talk to her, because, she looks like a total bibliovore, ‘kay? I mean, her book, is just so big. *scoff* I can’t believe it’s just so thick. It’s like, out there. I mean - gross. Look! She’s just so … smart!
[Sir Reads-a-Lot]
I like big books and I can not lie
You other brothers can’t deny
That when a girl walks in with an big fat book
And glasses on her face
You’re all thrilled, wanna talk to her quick
Cause you notice she’s reading Dickens
Deep in the tote she’s carrying
I’m hooked and I can’t stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get with you
And read you all night
My homeboys tried to warn me
But that book you got makes me so horny
Ooh, Tolkein - elves!
You say you wanna get in my shelves?
Well, use me, use me
‘Cause you ain’t that average bookie
I’ve seen them readin’
To hell with their speedin’
She’s Zinn, Prynne,
Got it goin’ like Jane Austen
I’m tired of magazines
Sayin’ short books are the thing
Take the average intellectual and ask him that
She gotta cook much book
So, fellas! (Yeah!) Fellas! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got big books? (Hell yeah!)
Tell ‘em to read it! (Read it!) Read it! (Read it!)
Read that giant tome!
Baby got book!
(read more …)
Absolutely awesome.
Brilliant.